adventures from the homefront, COVID-19 edition, episode 4: existential questions

Should I be social distancing from my dogs by using a leash that’s at least 6 feet long?
Does this mean I can stop picking up their poopies when we go for walks?

Why are people stocking up on ground beef? What are they doing with it?

Was it really necessary for Nick to walk into the bathroom where I was taking a dump, present me with his laptop, and ask me questions about small pox on the Oregon Trail?

What is the mountain range between the Black and Caspian Seas?

Will I be a better person if I can name all the parts of the vascular system of a plant?

Pasta and rice are gone from the grocery shelves, even when most everything else is fully stocked, even canned goods.  After decades of surviving Atkins, Paleo, Keto and other low-carb diets, have people discovered that carbo-loading is a protective factor against COVID-19?

How long can I survive without a toaster? Will I inevitably end up on a low-carb diet without toast?

Not so long ago this afternoon, I interrupted Jesse and Nick in a fight and lectured her about her hostility and she was not receptive and we yelled at each other.  So I sent her to her room.  Not 5 minutes later, Everest trotted downstairs feeling smug and well pleased with herself.  She also looked (unexpectedly) like this.

IMG_4785

IMG_4784

Jesse trotted down a few seconds later, also feeling smug and well-pleased, perhaps in light of the heavy giggling she was hearing from Nick and me.  We all apologized to each other, she accepted my embrace, and for a few moments at least, all will be well.

Is there a way for all conflicts, ever in the history of humanity from this day forward, to end this way?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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